“She just cried over a lost pencil…” — When End of Term Feels Too Much

Dear brilliant parents of the EPT Membership,

Last week we talked about the whirlwind of end-of-term — exams, trips, transitions, assemblies, and everything in between.

This week, I want to go deeper.

Because what we often see at the end of term isn't just tiredness — it's a nervous system crying out for safety.

Think about this:

A 12-year-old I work with, neurodivergent and able, burst into tears over a lost pencil case. Her mom explained, “I don’t understand — she’s never like this.”

But I knew. It wasn’t about the pencil and so did her parents. It was the final straw. The weight of small, cumulative stresses breaking the back of her internal scaffolding.

School was sooo busy. Her best friend was going away over summer. She was holding it together — until she couldn’t.

So, we made a plan. Not to fix everything. But to lighten the load and support her nervous system in recovering — while still showing up.

Here are 3 more essential tips, following on from last week to help you and your child weather the final stretch:

🌿 4. Focus on “Less Talking, More Doing”
When kids are overwhelmed, long explanations and reasoning can feel like more demands.

Instead, lean into co-regulation through calm actions: offering water, a quiet space, sitting nearby, a snack, a short walk. These are grounding, non-verbal messages of safety.

💬 Instead of: “You need to calm down and explain what's wrong.”
👉💓Try: “Here’s a drink. I’ll sit with you.”

🪁 5. Give Them Something to Look Forward To
Injecting moments of joy or predictability can anchor kids in a sense of hope and stability. It doesn't need to be big — it just needs to feel certain. Friday pancakes, Tuesday film night, a countdown to a favourite summer activity.

💬 “It’s Wednesday — so you know what that means. Ice -pop in the garden after school.” 

🧩 6. Break the Week into Chunks
The last 4-8 weeks can feel overwhelming. Use visual calendars or even hand-drawn “steps” on paper to chunk time: “Just until Friday,” or “Only 3 school mornings left this week.” This scaffolds their sense of time and builds emotional containment.

💬 “Let’s tick off today. That means we’ve done two already. Nearly there.”

Remember that 12-year-old?

Her mom introduced “Wednesday Walks” as a midweek reset, kept mornings quiet, and used a hand-drawn countdown with emoji stickers. Nothing flashy. But her daughter’s anxiety dropped, and the sobbing over little things turned into sighs and connection instead.

That’s the power of adjusting the environment, not the child.

These moments matter. They tell your child:

"You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be you. I’ll meet you where you are.”

You’re doing so much more than managing behaviours.

You’re building safety — the foundation of emotional regulation.

Looking forward to seeing ye later on in the Membership LIVE session at 4pm. 

Kindest regards, 

Lorraine 

Lorraine Madden Psychologist | Founder of the EPT Clinic